Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Family, What Does it Mean?

Webster online dictionary:
1. a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head: Household
2. a: a group of persons of common ancestry: Clan

Grandma and Grandpas Edwards 50th Anniversary
But definitions normally get the feeling wrong don't they? What does family really mean, to the heart? For me this past few days has been very interesting when it comes to family. I have always been known as the one in my family to listen, and to support and help everyone around me. I like it, it makes me feel good that my siblings and parents are trusting enough to talk to me without fear of judgement or anger. I will listen, offer advice if I feel it is necessary, and let my loved ones talk until they are talked out. I always feel warm and happy after conversations like that.

However, there comes a time in every family where the one who listens, and supports and holds onto the fears or worries of those around them, needs help too. It's a strange concept, that people who never need help, suddenly need help.

I am a very independent woman most of the time. I'm sure my husband would disagree on this, but I feel that I try my hardest to do the things I need to without much help. I try not to whine and complain about things in my life. I accept and move on. But over the weekend, that changed in a big way. Being put on light bed rest (even though it's only been 3 days) I am getting extremely frustrated! My husband won't let me do anything. I get up to get something to drink and he scolds me and pushes me back to bed. He say's "We don't want to baby coming to soon." like somehow I need to be reminded!
White Family, Christmas 2011

As soon as my midwife gave the order (yes drill sergeant, I will not pack and move. SIR), I began to stress. How were we going to get everything done in time? How was I going to clean? What about my school work? What about unloading at our new apartment? My mind went into hyper mode and I couldn't keep the tears from flowing. I've never been good with asking for help and I was now in a situation where if I didn't, nothing was going to get done (or the baby would come early)!

But those that I love, that care about me really came up to the plate. A cousin that just moved back from Alabama, came and helped me pack up my kitchen (that included cleaning. She is a SAINT.) An Aunt who also just moved up from Nevada came with boxes, packing material and helped pack up our office (without being asked. She just showed up!!!) Later this week, my sister-in-law will be here to help. And my mother is coming two days to help clean.

Family means to me that when you need them, they are there for you, without question or excuse. They come when it means the most, even if you didn't ask. They don't ask for anything in return, knowing that when they are in need, I will be there for them.

Ohana means familyfamily means nobody gets

 left behind. Or forgotten.

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